steve hall

totally zef

I realize that reaching out to a group as bizarre as Die Antwoord for an analogy is a bit risky, but I've been writing for about 6 hours today, so it feels right.  "Zef" is a term used to describe the South African counterculture, and the way that one rapper from DA puts it is, "Zef is you're poor but you're fancy."

Segue.

I've been writing about Zephaniah (see what happened there?) for those aforementioned 6 hours today, and I think it's bugging out my brain.  The first two-thirds are terrifying on several levels: God seems angry, God seems angry at everyone, and preaching about God being angry is, well, not fun.  The last part of Zephaniah sings in 3 part harmony like some bearded dudes from Seattle, it's all pretty and nice.  But that almost makes it harder to reconcile what's happening in the first movements of the book.

Those of you that have stumbled on here because this was tagged "Zephaniah" expecting to find some linguistic and literary gold nuggets, apologies ahead of time.  I too love those nuggets, but I find myself increasingly out of time which results in dusting off the old Biblia Hebraica Stuttgartensia feeling like when I stuff too much crap in my recycling container (if you're reading this from South Carolina, a recycling container is a lot like a garbage can, only different). I mean I don't read my Hebrew Bible from right to left, or, like, at all. Sorry, Homiletics Prof.

But I digress.

Now that I've popped my head up for air after furiously working to get something, anything on paper, I think part of what Zephaniah is saying to me is, you're totally zef.  You're poor, but you're fancy. You have absolutely no business coming to the feast, but we've got a seat with your name on it. Your fanciness has nothing to do with you, it's just for some reason the King is in love with you. He sometimes just sits and thinks about you and doesn't say anything.

Which I find to be...unbelievable.  Not in the sense of, "wow that is like, so cool and unbelievable." More like, I honestly don't know if I've ever conceived of God in this way, and it's pretty difficult to start.

Yes it's Lent, and I'm starting to really feel the poverty side of my zefness—which is good!  But how strange that Zephaniah has no problem giving me Lent and Easter in one breath.  No problem saying, you're poor but you're fancy.  You're more of a disaster than you'll ever realize, but put on this coat and come to the King's party.

Ok then.

 

Filed under  //   Zephaniah   lent  
Posted March 1, 2012

the prayer of st. ephrem the syrian, and what's my body got to do with it?

Schmemann continues to describe the Orthodox lenten worship services in his book Great Lent. A couple of things struck me in this section.  First off was Schmemann's connection of repentance with corporate worship.  He says,

The meaning and the spirit of the Great Lent find their first and most important expression in worship (emphasis added).  Not only individuals but the whole Church acquires a penitential spirit ...

My default approach to repentance continues to be individualistic.  The Eastern church has much to teach us regarding corporate repentance.

Schmemann also gives us the text of St. Ephram the Syrian's prayer that is used often throughout the worship services of the Eastern church's Lent observance.

'O Lord and Master of my life, take from me the spirit of sloth, despair, lust of power and idle talk.'

Prostration.

'But give rather the spirit of chastity, humility, patience and love to Thy servant.'

Prostration.

'Yea, O Lord and King, grant me to see my own sins and not to judge my brother for Thou art blessed unto ages of ages. Amen'

Prostration.

Then all bow twelve times saying: 'O God cleanse me, a sinner.' and the whole prayer is read again, with one prostration at the end.

 

Ordination_prostration1000

Schmemann continues to explain how this prayer offers us the 'simplest and purest expression of repentance in all it's dimensions.' But what really struck me was when Schmemann gives his explanation for all the constant prostrating done by all in worship.  Schmemann tells us that,

The Lenten rules of the Orthodox Church pay great attention to prostrations: through them the body participates in the effort of 'breaking down' our pride and self-satisfaction.

My anthropology is in complete agreement with Schmemann's assumptions here: human beings are not some carved up total that can be broken down to physical + spiritual.  We are, rather, physico-spiritual creatures.  Things that we do physically impact us emotionally, intellectually, and spiritually.

As I say, my assumptions about humanity are in line with Schmemann's here, and yet, curiously, my worship practices have almost nothing in them (save for a few small movements) that would express this belief.  Hmm.

 

after ash wednesday

Last night was the first time I've attended an Ash Wednesday service.  It was an honor and a pleasure to also lead in worship along with the other leaders at Intown.  It was a somber service, and it was quite moving to take part in the liturgy that got repeated over and over and over to each individual who came forward for the impression of ashes:

Son of God, from dust you were formed, to dust you shall return.

Daughter of God, from dust you were formed, to dust you shall return.

Moving out into the city with the sign of death and hope on my forehead was an experience unto itself.

Ashwed

Today, I'm feeling worn.  Adding another service to the week, along with a few other work related things has created the perfect storm of activity, making it difficult to stop. and breathe. and focus.

One of the Sundays of Preparation that the Eastern Orthodox church observes centers around the Final Judgment.  The church remembers those who have passed on before, and by extension each member is reminded of their own impending death.

And after death the judgment.

I have to say, functionally, I feel like I don't believe this hardly at all.  The way I so selfishly and lazily spend my days, it's as if I'll never run out, it's like I think I'll live forever and the only person I'll answer to is myself.

When I stop to consider that I will die and that I will face the One who gave me breath and body and days, I want my life to look drastically different.  But I don't mean that I suddenly want to pray for hours on end and wear Christian t-shirts and hand out tracts that look like $20 bills.  

I do want to pray more.  But I also want to learn a foreign language.  I want to take more photographs.  I want to stay up late drinking wine with my wife talking about all sorts of things. I want to befriend people that society tells me I have no business being friends with.  I want to work harder and rest harder. I want to understand how a flower blooms.

I think I want to be more like Jesus.  The Man of Sorrows was also the Drunken Messiah.  The homeless itinerant preacher, who spoke often about God's judgment, was also a great dinner guest, a great partier.

Strangely, I think that only when I really sober up will I be able to truly enjoy the party.  As Schmemann says, Lent is the great school of repentance.  It's the great school of sobering up, the great school of contemplating my own death, and in some backwards way, as it leads me to Easter, it is the school of enjoying the party.

Filed under  //   Alexander Schmemann   Ash Wednesday   death   lent   repentance  

a school of repentance

I've been neglecting my writing for too long, so as a way of return, I've decided to do some free-thought Lenten writing using Alexander Schmemann's The Great Lent: A School of Repentance (which is currently free on Kindle) as a guide to my own thinking process.

He begins his book thusly, 

Brethren, while fasting bodily, let us also fast spiritually; let us loosen every bond of injustice; let us destroy the strong fetters of violence; let us tear up every unjust writing; let us give bread to the hungry and let us welcome the homeless poor to our houses, that from Christ our God we may receive the great mercy.

Schmemann then goes on to describe the meaning and intention behind the Sundays of Preparation. I must say, given my baptisty (read: anti-Catholic) upbringing, my newfound appreciation for the Church calendar still did not prepare me for a three week "pre-Lent" period (I mean, come on, isn't 40 days of feeling bad about stuff enough?)!  Needless to say, I did not observe the Sundays of Preparation this year, but hope to include them in my own personal observances next year if not incorporate them into the liturgies of my community.

First of all the practicalities: last year I gave up Facebook for Lent and it was great!  So great, that I still have yet to reopen my account.  This year I'm giving up refined sugar (sorry, Details Pharisees, I'm not going to be spending much time hunting labels for sugar's many cousins.  The general idea is rather to give up sweets and the obviously-sugared), and my wife and I are giving up evening-tv.

As I've been pondering and writing for our Ash Wednesday service this evening, I think the thing that is striking me the hardest as Lent begins is my own lack of remorse over sin, and my lack of acknowledgement of my own frailty.  It's my hope and prayer that, as painful as the school of repentance will (most likely) turn out to be, I'll arrive at Easter more brokenhearted for my sin, more aware of my own certain death.

Filed under  //   Alexander Schmemann   Ash Wednesday   lent   repentance  

all the wrong problems, all the wrong heroes

This morning I was in a foul mood.

For no reason.

Well, for no good reason.  Last night the wife and I went and looked at this duplex in what I like to call the "Pleasantville" neighborhood of Portland.  The space was amazing.  You could park two of our current kitchens in their kitchen (which by the way had a dishwasher).  High ceilings, old world charm, heated tile floors, a bedroom the size of Australia.  And it would only be $100 more a month than what we're paying now.

We came home excitedly talking about how we would arrange our furniture and make use of all the storage, how different the neighborhood was from ours, how far we'd have to bike to get around.  We talked about our spending and our budget and our income and before you knew it, we'd talked ourselves right out of an apartment light years ahead of our own because of $100 a month.

Last week our car broke down and I spent hours researching Subarus we couldn't afford because that would solve all our problems.  This week I've grown tired (yet again) of hand-washing every dish we own, so I spent hours looking for a new place to live that will, obviously, solve all our problems.

This morning, as I realized that I need to stumble toward some understanding of contentment, I read the Daily Office and some Rolling Stone, and slowly awareness dripped into me like water through our clogged water filter on our kitchen sink: I have all the wrong problems because I have all the wrong heroes.

It's so easy for me to look around at many of my friends who are much further down the line of American Dreaminess than I am, and rather than just be happy for them, I start looking at everything in my life as a problem.  The truth is, this "problem apartment" that I find too small, was a miracle from God: we had a week to find a place to live and not only did we find a place in a great area, we're mere blocks from several different people who have become dear friends.

Somewhere along the way material gratification became my heart's song, turning Jesus into the kind of hero I would never want to emulate.  And let's face it, the fact that this apartment was a miracle 18 months ago, and today is just a closet with good lighting suggests that the problem is not with the apartment.  The problem is with me.

A Liturgical Life

Each Sunday, as people filter into the sanctuary where I worship, clutching a jacket or a cup of coffee, a hush comes over us all as the announcements end. Suddenly, some rousing music begins and we’re off and singing. Next we alternate between listening to a leader speak and speaking as a group. Some people read some ancient writings (often poetry), we sing some songs, another leader gets up and speaks for an extended period of time, and then we rush forward to eat a tiny meal of bread and wine.

These are things we almost never do in other spheres of our lives. Example: when’s the last time you did some group readings or sing-a-longs with your coworkers? I thought so. So what, exactly, is the deal? Why do we do what we do, and why do we do it the way we do it?

The early church fathers had a saying, “Lex orandi, lex credendi”, rendered something like, “the law of prayer is the law of belief”. However, the concept behind this phrase is about more than just prayer. As the leaders of the early church thought deeply about how the church should express her worship of Christ, it became clear that the way we worship actually informs our faith, it shapes what we believe. That is to say, form matters every bit as much as content.

I grew up in a small, rural Baptist church. Our worship service consisted of some coffee time, announcements, 3 simple hymns accompanied by piano, a time for all to offer prayer requests publicly (until the age of 7 I thought we were talking about ‘prairie quests’ and was consistently disappointed in the lack of adventure during that time), and a sermon. As I moved into jr. high and high school we added a guitar in our youth services. Unconsciously I began to think of Jesus as a cross-legged hippy, sitting with us in a circle, playing guitar, sweeping his hair out of his eyes.

In college, I had an opportunity to go with a friend to a Greek Orthodox Church on a Sunday morning. I was completely unprepared for what I would experience: prayer candles burning in the narthex, colorful icons and intricate woodwork throughout the narthex and nave, an ornately decorated priest in the fenced off sanctuary. The priest waved a censor as he led the liturgy; I’ll never forget that smell, one of the most beautiful scents I’ve ever experienced. A chanting choir was in the balcony behind us, giving voice to the praise of the angels. 

That afternoon, as I tried to understand what I’d just experienced in that foreign worship service, I realized that for the first time I began to consider that God might actually be majestic. The way I worshipped, the sights, smells, sounds, the music, order of worship, all of it began to reshape my view of God. Growing up I got a picture of the nearness of God, that day in college I began to form a picture of his transcendency.

In his book, Desiring the Kingdom, James Smith reminds us that, “we are what we love, and our love is shaped, primed, and aimed by liturgical practices that take hold of our gut and aim our heart in certain ends.” In other words, we are constantly being shaped by our worship practices. The strange thing is that most of the time that reshaping is taking place subconsciously. It’s not until we’re faced with a choice in life, a way for us to express what is important to us, that we begin to see how we’ve been shaped by our worship.

In using liturgy, the elements of our worship have been chosen with care in order that we might be reshaped as the people of Jesus. We want to uphold the immanence and transcendence of God. We want to maintain our gathering as a time of worship, where we’re vertically oriented toward the Trinity, but also where we remain firm-footed on earth, pushing out the gospel in a horizontal line, pushing back the darkness and brokenness of the world and carrying forth the light and healing of Jesus. 

We remind ourselves every week that confession and belief are at the core of the Christian life. We are called to constantly be giving up more of our life to the lordship of Jesus, turning to him in faith and hope. As we’re reminded of what the gospel has worked in our lives we sing out in joyous praise, and we give our money away. We situate ourselves under the preached Word, not so we have an opportunity to critique, not so we can gain some inner secret knowledge that will make us ‘truly Christian’--no, we sit under the Word because it is alive with the life of the Spirit of Jesus, because we need to hear the voice of Jesus wooing us again to enter in to his marriage proposal more deeply. We come to his table to be nourished, to be rebuilt in our faith, to imbibe his life as our life.

We do all these things as individuals, yes, each responding to and being reshaped by the liturgy, but we do all of these things corporately, as a community, always being reminded that we are indeed a family, a body, a church.

Then, as we exit the sanctuary, jackets in hand, we move back into God’s world, we run back into the city in smaller groups as people that have been reshaped by their worship of a God who has come near to all in Christ. We move back into this world to continue living a liturgical life.

 

Filed under  //   Desiring the Kingdom   Jamie Smith   church   liturgy   worship  

Toward a Theology of Christian Hospitality, pt. 3

[see part one and two]

Jesus Christ died for the whole wide world, not just for those inside the church. Therefore, a theological test for the fidelity of a church is hospitality.

Will Willimon, Welcome Others As Christ Has Welcomed You

Enacting Hospitality

Given that hospitality is such a huge part of Christian mission, how do we enact hospitality at Intown?  As a Christian church, Intown has two main categories for enacting hospitality: the Sunday morning Gathering, and everything else.

Sunday mornings we gather to celebrate the first day of the New Creation--to be reminded that we serve a risen Savior who is making all things new.  This celebration is a time for the community of God’s people to gather together and partake in the angelic worship that happens without ceasing in the heavenly realm.  This celebration is also a time for those outside the faith to experience a moment of New Creation, to experience the intersection of heaven and earth.

As such, Sunday worship gatherings are the most opportune times for the Church to feast--not in a way that only looks to satisfy the insider, but in a way that actively expects the inclusion of strangers.  

When we have coffee and pastries and fruit we aren’t just looking out for those who forgot to have breakfast before coming to worship.  Rather we are seeking to create an atmosphere that appropriately expresses the hospitality and feasting that is so clearly seen in the gospel. Our refreshment table is an entree into and a continuation of the verbal ‘gospeling’ that we do through song, prayer, scripture, and sacrament.

Once the worship gathering is over, we move back into our respective neighborhoods and communities.  Though the designated day in which we celebrate the Resurrection and the New Creation may have come to a close, we must be careful to remember that we enter into the other six days as the New Creation.  

We are to leave Sundays with the fragrance of Resurrection lingering within us.  As we do so, we will enact a continuation of mission and hospitality, inviting brothers and sisters, and especially strangers and the undeserving into our homes to feast at our expense.  Hosting or participating in a community group is one avenue that this sort of hospitality can take, but it cannot be overstated: christian hospitality is a way of life, not an event, no matter how regular.

Toward a Theology of Christian Hospitality, pt. 2

[This is Part Two of a Three Part series on Christian Hospitality.  Check out Part One]

The church is to participate actively in the life of the world as slaves and envoys of the true King, in a manner akin to Jesus, extending an invitation to those, like they were previously, who are not worthy guests, who are marginalized in the wider society, who do not consider themselves invited, and who have not even heard there is such a banquet available.

Luke Bretherton, Hospitality as Holiness: Christian Witness Amid Moral Diversity

Hospitality and the Mission of The Church

The en-action of the Church’s mission is nothing short of hospitality.  As we allow the service and hospitality of the incarnation to sit deeper within our lives, we will begin to have a greater awareness that our call in the continuation of the mission of the Triune God is a call to express Christ-like service and hospitality to sisters, brothers, friends, and strangers.

This call to mission and hospitality is not distinct or separate from the Church’s remembrance and declaration of the gospel.  Rather it is situated firmly within it.  One metaphor for how the gospel has changed the plight of humanity is the story that undeserving people have been invited in to feast at the table of the King.  This metaphor cannot be understood apart from actual feasting, as seen in how important feasts were for the people of God in the OT, and how those feasts were recast in the NT with the last supper and the love feasts of the early church.

Much like the collusion of sorrow and joy, pain and celebration, that is found in the story of the Cross, so hospitality is an act of feasting that requires fasting.  Sharing with others is not done simply out of overflow.  The call of Christian mission and Christian hospitality is a call of full surrender, a call to release our grasp on what is “ours”, our time, our money, our space.  We are called to intentionally invite the undeserving to share what we have been given.

When we understand the call of Christian mission, we will begin to see the complexity of Christian hospitality:

-hospitality is costly, time consuming, and heart breaking.

-hospitality is an attitude, a way of life, not an occasional action

-hospitality is rewarding and joyful

-hospitality is feasting with outsiders

Toward a Theology of Christian Hospitality, pt. 1

[note: what follows is an article I wrote for my church, hence the overcontextualized language]

What is christian hospitality, and why is it an important practice for christian individuals, families, and communities?  Is understanding christian hospitality really a theological enterprise?  What follows is a very brief attempt to answer these questions in a way that will help us as a community understand why we do what we do, and how we should go about being hospitable people.

A standard definition of hospitality is, “the friendly and generous reception and entertainment of guests, visitors, or strangers.”  This definition, though quite straightforward, could sustain several pages worth of discussion.  But rather than focus on what hospitality is in and of itself, I wish to address what distinctly christian hospitality looks like.

A christian view of human persons closely links human self-awareness with theological understanding.  That is to say, as christians we believe that a triune God stated, “Let us create man in our image.”  A result of this belief is that our understanding of the character, mission, and methods of God, including how the members of the Trinity interrelate with one another, will in turn shape our understanding of how humans are to behave, how human beings are called to interrelate with one another.

In a sense, we could see the entire storyline of the missio Dei, the entire enactment of God’s love to the world as acts of hospitality.  Early in Genesis we see the Triune God creating a universe of beauty and vitality, breathing life into his creatures.  This God creates human beings and places them in a garden that he has prepared for them.  This is God’s world, a place of shalom and majesty, and within this world he invites humanity to enter in to his care for it.  In this garden God walks with man and woman, talking with them.  A friendly and generous reception and entertainment if ever there was one.

Despite humanity’s eventual rejection of God’s care, God continues to pursue his people.  He invites Abram to journey with him, eventually making his covenant with him, promising him descendants and a land in which to dwell.  At this point a long and sordid history unfolds.  God’s people (Abraham’s descendants) circle in and out, cycling through worship of this generous God and rejection and outright rebellion against His hospitable presence in their lives.  These cycles continue until God himself steps into their lives in a new and unparalleled way: the Incarnation.

The incarnation is a glorious and deep doctrine of the christian faith with far reaching implications that would require an eternity to map out.  The advent of Jesus, this God-in-the-flesh adds layers and layers to our understanding of hospitality and what it means to reach out to those around us.  Jesus reminded his hearers regularly that he had not come to be a doctor to those that had no illnesses, but he had come to find the sick, to seek and save the lost, to charge after the one sheep.  Jesus came to receive sinful people, to bring them in to the kingdom he was building, to graft them into the people of God.  Jesus took alienated strangers, people who were enemies of God and made them the sons and daughters of God.

This welcoming of strangers was an act of generosity like the world has never seen.  Hospitality isn’t cheap.  Welcoming others is a costly thing to do.  Jesus models this for us by giving up his own life in order to welcome strangers to the household of God.

 

 

strange negotiations: an open letter to everyone

these strange negotiations, 

man they really are getting me down.

these strange negotiations

i feel like a stranger in my hometown.

Somewhere, the Christian world is blooming.  I just know it.  I feel it in my bones, like a change in the weather.  

But I can't see it.

I can't see it because I can't lift my head out of the small corner of evangelicalism where I reside due to the tweeted bullets whizzing past, the blogpost bombs dropping ever closer, ever faster.  This is to say nothing of the closeted conversations of which I am constantly a part, here, and there, and everywhere.

Of course, I'm upset again by more fallout from this insatiable need felt by so many within evangelicalism to "defend" everything all the time. The more I hear these strident defenders blasting out their war calls, the more I picture them constantly yawning like Sarlacc, hoping for a "heterodox" whipping boy to stumble into their jaws in order that they might feed their unending hunger to play knight in shining armor. 

And yes, I'm beginning to feel like a stranger in my hometown.  The more I look around the old neighborhoods, the less I want to stay in town.  I'm not leaving the faith or anything, and my ecclesiology is too robust to sit at home and play church online, I guess I'm just sighing in public.

But here's the problem, boys.  My people read what you write.  They listen to what you say.  They track your tweets.  What may take you a matter of minutes or hours to post--a controversial video clip, a dismissive tweet, or a fear-mongering blog--takes me months of sidetracking discussion, confusion, and chaos.  You're creating dissension and dischord in the body, a trait which is much more akin to the false teachers noted in Scripture than any of the theological musings you so obstreperously condemn.

Rather than feed my people something they need in their local context, I'm forced to interact with your prophecies of doom.  Rather than interact with my agnosti-buddhis-atheis-indifferen-tical neighbors and build relationships and start conversations well, I'm forced to answer questions that you have put in their minds.  You put them on edge and drive the conversation into a canyon from which it can barely emerge.

The point is, Christendom is over, and some of us are trying to get on with the mission of Jesus in light of that. In short, what that means is that in the trenches, not only do we not shoot those that uphold the Apostles' Creed, but we count them as sisters and brothers, comrades.

So please, just stop.  Your open letters have become open sores.  Deal with heretics, if they are truly heretics, in your own local context, and just get on with the mission.